Dear Dilana,
You'll likely never find this or read it, but it all still needs to be said. I want to thank you for auditioning for cockrock supernova, because had you not done so, likely I would never had heard your work. You, Toby, and Magni must be the reason the second series of Rockstar existed, nothing else makes sense.
I loved you right from the first moment you stepped on the stage scary, hard as nails, and exciting, not to mention a little bit hot. And your voice... like the diamond part of gravel. Week after week, your bubbly, geniune, raw personality, your wicked sense of humour, and above all, your excellent performances were the best thing about the show. In the end, it is all about the music, and while Toby and Magni rocked it, you were the standout act. You made me love songs I hadn't previously liked, and songs I had previously liked went to a whole new level in your hands and your voice... especially Mother Mother. Yeah, I saw how you got dragged through the mud so Tommy Lee had a reason not to pick you when you were the standout, but instead of being angry at you the way so many were, my heart ached for you; my honesty has gotten me in trouble more than once, and in a situation like that, I would have been dead in the water. All the talk of moving on, and then the persistent refusal to do so in my mind just added insult to the injury that was singling you out for punishment so Tommy Lee would have an excuse to go with his choice from the start, "his boy" Lukas.
I was relieved to read that you were happy to come second, and selfishly I was glad of it too; I so look forward to hearing an album from you along the lines of 'Supersoul', with all you learned on the show. I know it has to be good, because I bought a copy of Wonderfool for the man in my life for Christmas. Sadly it arrived two days after Christmas, but that was well and truly in time for me to fall in love with it while I was living in a new country, temporarily without my partner in crime.
I adore the track 'PMS' where you sound androgynously like Brian Molko (a personal muse) not just for that, but for the clever lyrics (always a way to my heart). 'Solo' is clever, environmental, and makes me want to sing along. 'Do You Now' reminds me so much of myself... I wish I had had the sense to tell him to follow his dick, and I wish I had been able to be as funny about my hurt. 'Elvis Motor Inn' and 'Kissed a Butterfly' are breathtaking for their emotional honesty in times of happiness and sadness, and for being able to say things that women aren't "supposed" to say. The songs that really get me every last time, though, are 'Livin' by the Day', and 'Wonderfool'. Both of them appeal to my love of bittersweet stories, and cleverly written songs. Individually 'Livin' by the Day' could have been written about me, about past lovers, about so many people in my life. It feels like my own personal Postsecret. And 'Wonderfool' is what all people in love should be to each other, more honest than any just about any other love song I have ever heard.
Thank you for being who you are, and please, please write more music and release them where I can get them. Come to Australia, I would see you in a heartbeat. And in the words of Placebo (with whom I nearly filed you in iTunes, but somehow "Punk Pop" isn't really what you do) "don't foget to be the way you are", because it's real, it's awesome, and it rocks.
From a new fan who wishes she was an old fan.
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